Friday, June 6, 2008

offensive.

I currently have no readers. This is a nice place to be. I am entering the wild world of blogging, hoping to find a way to escape the daily repetition of waking, eating, enforcing time out, and sleeping. The point? This blog is about me and for me. Selfish? I know!

If you are reading - Please don't be offended. I have post-poned this venture for two reasons:

  1. I only write in my personal journal when I'm sad, menstruating, depressed, or all three. I've told spouse that upon my death he should burn all journals. If not - all happy memories will cease to exist upon their reading. And offense will occur. I fear that may happen here...although I hope to exercise a bit of tact and control.


  2. I have lost friends; good, college roommate, forever friends type friends. One Christmas, as I helped plan a friends/roommate reunion, lost friend emailed the following to the entire group

    -Lost Friend: "My son has peanut allergy, and doesn't have enough impulse control yet to not eat peanut stuff if he sees it, so I hope you wouldn't mind not bringing things with nuts?"

    -Roommate #1: "Okay for me to bring [my sister]? She'll be coming down from Seattle that night, so she'll probably be late, but she really wants to see all the girls and babes."

    -Me: "Yeah! Of course [your sister] is invited. I don't think you even need to ask....that is, unless she is a peanut, or manufactured partially from, or in a plant that packages peanut products."

    -Lost Friend: "Just so you know, so you don't do this to someone else too...It's pretty insensitive and offensive to mom's of peanut allergic children to be made fun of for trying to protect their child from something that shows up at parties often, and yet kills them. Families of peanut allergic children need nothing except support and understanding from their friends and family in order to deal with their problem. If your inclination is to joke about this serious problem, it would be wise to first wait from a cue from the family that they're okay with it being a laughing matter."

So what happened? You're on edge, I've got you hooked. I cried, then I groveled, apologized, and said apology was accepted. I have not heard from Lost Friend since.

I have many, many other examples (future posts).

Grandparents - I know that you want to hear about the kids. Maybe. Sometimes. If I'm really depressed. Again, selfish. I know.

So do not be surprised when you are offended....or depressed after reading this blog. Just blame me, my selfishnes, and don't complain.

8 comments:

Kyle said...

Your comment to your roommate was hillarious. I'm tired of people that get offended so easily. What a nut....er...annoying person!

Greg said...

lost friend needs to chill out. Better off without her and her impulsive peanut eating child. Another example of why we would be better off with natural selection.

Mary said...

Just found your blog through your spouse's blog. Can I be a "found friend" if I really just blog stalk to keep up on how you are doing? You're hilarious by the way.

Jacks said...

Mary - Ooh, I thought I emailed you about it. Thank you for finding me:) My heart is warmed.

And thank you for commenting. I'm reassured that so far, the three of you are not offended.

Judy Tan said...

I am going to create a blog about how your blog depresses me. I mean amuses me. Thanks for the entertainment Jackie. I'll be sure to check back on your musings 28 days from today.

Jacks said...

Judy - please create a blog? It would make me lauuuughhhh.

And how slow am I? Clin had to explain the 28 day comment to me. Kind of how he always has to point out my cycle is starting before I even realize it on my own.

kelly riding said...

funny. funny. funny. i am glad you entered the blogging world. i've only been waiting about a year for this moment and now it's finally here. i am a happy girl!

Nibley-Baker Blog said...

Susan just sent me a link to this sure-to-be-award-winning blog. Can I be a "found friend," too, even though, according to your criteria for journal writing, probably half of your mission journal is full of laments from your time as my companion?