Thursday, July 24, 2008

practical.


I risked my life for our family reunion. That's right. I put my life on the line to fulfill a reunion requirement entitled, Christmas in July.

In an attempt to prepare, last minute, for a white elephant exchange - I ran into a store that we passed in South Salt Lake, on the way to our Wyoming retreat. The store was called Dollar Store and More. Little did I know that "more" meant Much, Much More.

The moment I stepped into the store I knew that the store's emphasis was more, rather than dollar. There was hardly anything in stock. One corner consisted of $1.00 items. You know, mostly your token princess paraphernalia and baby accessories.

A second row consisted of food - or what some might consider food if they were living off of food storage. Cans. Lots and lots of cans. Mostly little sausages and strange veggies.

Clinging to the princess paraphernalia corner, I noticed a few things:
  1. The store had bars on all of its windows and doors. That should have been a clue.

  2. An interesting smell permeated the premises.

  3. All customers that entered after me were very tough looking.
  4. The two cashiers were even tougher looking.

I grabbed a few princess items - as quickly as possible, and ran to the front cashier to ask if all were $1.00. The second I opened my mouth I realized that the man was not used to answering questions about princess paraphernalia.... No, he was out of his element, and looked at me as if I was crazy for even asking.

He was used to answering questions about a more complex item. As I looked around, I realized that I was surrounded by drug paraphernalia (bongs and other glass contraptions that I did not recognize). The entire front of the store was full of interesting items.

I quickly turned to the younger cashier, who seemed a bit more willing to deal with me - ran out to the car to get cash (they do not take debit cards for purchases under $5.00. You know. In case you visit). Said my final goodbye to Clin as I re-entered the store.

I made it out safely and locked the car doors. Adrenaline rushing, I realized my valiant endeavor and decided my white elephant gifts definitely should be raised up and held in high esteem above all others. For sure no one else risked their life in an attempt to prepare for our silly July.

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